When it comes to it, we are all alone. We are up to ourselves.
Being social creatures, humans are constantly looking for companionship. We are looking for warmth and support, passion and care, understanding and respect. We are looking to belong, to attach, to grow roots.
We are constantly growing and expanding the ‘circle of friends’ around ourselves. Just look at some friendlists on social media. Do people really, intimately know that many people? I am guilty as charged. I have over 1000 friends on Facebook. Yeah, right…
Do I have friends? Yes. I have some that I grew up with, some I went to Uni with and some I have common interests with be it Literature, Travel or Parenting. My mum is my friends and so is my daughter. BUT
I came to a very sad and cold realisation lately (I’ve came up with it many times before but the events of this year hit so close to home that this realisation cemented itself in my brain) – we are all alone. We are so alone it echoes inside our bones…
Look, who would understand you better than yourself?
Who would explain your feelings or emotions, or thoughts better than yourself.
When you need protection or even defence, who would be the best protector and defender?
When all is said and done who is left there with you to commiserate, to eat ice cream, to write poetry?
When your loved one dies, who is hurting as much as you do? Who can understand you completely and fully?
When you like someone and it is only one way, who can understand your anguish? Who can heal your wounds? Who can get as angry as you and… get it completely?
Don’t tell me it’s BFF. Bull… Trust me. It is. Best friends or any friends for that matter are for a reason or a season. We outgrow each other. We outsmart, outlive, outreach. We change our preferences and our tastes. We change our partners and our places of residence. Friends change. We change. No, BFF is not a panacea or an absolute solution.
You can say, other half. Oh, don’t even start me on other-half mythology. No way. Other half does not necessary mean love forever and always and walking into sunset together. Other half can be million of things and can mean million of things (they are called life lessons).
Our parents? Partially, but not fully. It’s to do with different generation, different perspective. Hell, it is to do with being different, separate being.
We are unique. We are exclusive. Thus, we are alone. From the moment our souls land on clouds up above looking for a path (parents) to come down into human world to the moment we pass over into clouds again. We are alone.
Thus, the moral lesson is: be your own friend, get to know yourself, get comfortable with yourself. Defend and protect, respect and love. You are the only thing/being/soul/love you get in this world. All the rest of it is complimentary
Your input is greatly appreciated
2 thoughts on “Only the lonely”
I appreciate what you have written. It is true…we are alone. When we realize that, and can honestly become our own best friend..the loneliness subsides. When we smile, the whole world will smile with us…maybe we won’t FEEL so alone then. Thanks for writing this thought-provoking piece.
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I totally agree with every single word…that’s our drama and our punishment from the heaven (God, Universe, prior lives..depends on what you believe in)…We constantly searching for something: trueself, soulmate, the 2nd half…we don’t look for it inside though. No one tought us to…some finally realise the “scary truth”..does it make them happier? Not sure…May be it’s better to live in a fairy tale, created once without any eyes-openings…It’s lovely in there, we can make anything up, we generate the dreams like crasy…the truth does hurt…
“We are so alone it echoes inside our bones…”..love your saying.
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