Cry me a reason…

Why do we cry at the funerals? Stupid question? Do you really think so? I am going to disagree with you.

I attended a funeral recently (they’ve becoming a regular event in our family this year). And I cried… Yeah, it is very unusual for me. Firstly, I don’t do funerals. Secondly, I hardly ever cry…

I stood there, on the margins, looking at people I know very well and hardly at all, watching, observing, thinking. I cried and I thought why? I looked around and I thought some more. By the end of it my eyes dried out and I came up with a dry list of reasons as to Why We Cry at the Funerals

1. We cry because it’s a norm. It is expected of us, especially if we are part of the family of the deceased
2. We cry because we are utterly exhausted from everything that happened before and at time of this person’s death
3. We cry out of relief. The sufferings have ended, either for us or for the person in the coffin
4. We cry because we have lost…
   • a person has lost a battle with illness
   • a child has lots his/her parent
   • a friend has lost some part of the connection to his/her past, childhood, etc
   • as a child he/she has lost innocence, protection, safety and unconditional love of the parent… something that can never be found ever again
   • as a person he/she has lost the security of thinking that everything is forever or for a very long time, at least
   • as an adult one has lost the assurance of one’s importance. World will go on when we are gone. Nothing will change. Nothing will matter. We do not matter… World would not stop with our death. People would not stop living with our death

    

5. We cry in the face of finality of it all.
6. We cry out of helplessness…

The person we are here, at the cemetery, for, does not care. They are not hurting anymore. We are left to hurt… we are left to figure out: what, why and how to go on…

DISCLAIMER: I am not sarcastic, cold or an idiot. I’ve cried so much for the past year. I’ve lost so many… May be, my sarcasm, irony and certain detachment are the means to deal with it all. Just may be